I need to make a decision

So the big, monumental question is: do I want to revert back to my old eating plan, where I will certainly lose weight, or continue to eat what I am eating now?

Here’s the pain point: I could go back on that old eating plan, and yes, the weight will come off to some degree. But, I wouldn’t have enough stamina for my gym classes. And I’m grumpy and resentful because I don’t eat really any carbs, until my cheat days when I binge and panic when the clock ticks down to my 5 hour cheat being over. Or, I can continue to eat a mix of veggies, protein and carbs, with plenty of treats, and be what I prefer to call, juicy. Being juicy results in me being happy, bubbly and energetic. I have plenty of stamina for my gym classes and I’m excited about meals and snacks. I don’t dread work lunches or family gatherings because I can eat there. Food is delicious!

BUT… my clothes are tight and in a size I don’t love. My knees feel tight and sore. My bras, even with extenders, squeeze my sides. I broke the zipper on my winter coat when I bent down to pick up an item at the grocery store. I’m embarrassed to see people I haven’t seen in a while. I’m so uncomfortable in my body. This all overshadows my happiness. It curbs my bubbliness and energetic nature. I’m so ashamed.

So what’s a guurrl to do?? I was at the hair salon recently with my daughter, being careful how I was wording my thoughts because I didn’t want my daughter to be tainted by my negative feelings about my weight. I want so badly to be a healthy weight and enjoy food. And my hairdresser said something interesting: why can’t you have both?

Pardon? What do you mean? Isn’t it one or the other?

She went on to explain that my working out will naturally help me lose some weight. I chewed on my lip, thinking this over. I’ve been going to the gym for about 6 weeks at that point. I haven’t gotten on a scale during that time and I have no desire to. But I have noticed that where my pants give my sides a squeeze, not as much skin is squishing out over. That’s progress I suppose. I guess I’m just used to losing weight FAST on my old eating plan. This will take longer. But I know that is actually better. Healthier. But I’ve never been a patient person. How can I start that now? How do I change my mindset so I can make better food choices?

We chatted about a weight loss clinic she knows that some of her clients have had incredible success at. They learned how to change their mindsets around food and to eat healthy. When she named the clinic, I almost fell over: my doctor had just referred me to that exact one! I decided I would follow up with the clinic tomorrow.

Could I have my cake (be a healthy weight) and eat it too (not starve/restrict myself)?